Two songs having defined my day.

Dead Milkmen Punk Rock Girl One Saturday I took a walk to Zipperhead I met a girl there and she almost knocked me dead Punk rock girl Please look at me Punk rock girl What do you see? Let's travel round the world Just you and me punk rock girl I tapped her on the shoulder And said do you have a bell? She looked at me and smiled and said she did not know Punk rock girl Give me a chance Punk rock girl Let's go slam dance We'll dress like Minnie Pearl Just you and me punk rock girl We went to the Philly Pizza Company And ordered some hot tea The waitress said well no, we only have it iced So we jumped up on the table and shouted anarchy And someone played a Beach Boys song on the jukebox It it was "California Dreamin" So we started screamin On such a winter's day She took me to her parents for a Sunday meal Her father took one look at me and he began to squeal Punk rock girl It makes no sense Punk rock girl Your dad is vice president Just like the Duke of Earl Yeah you're for me punk rock girl We went to a shopping mall And laughed at all the shoppers And security guards trailed us to a record shop We asked for Mojo Nixon They said he don't work here We said if you don't got Mojo Nixon then your store could use some fixin We got into her car away we started rollin I said how much you pay for this Said nothin man it's stolen Punk rock girl You look so wild Punk rock girl Let's have a child We'll name her Minnie Pearl Just you and me Eat fudge banana swirl Just you and me We'll travel round the world Just you and me Punk rock girl

Tom Waits Small Change (1976) Step Right Up Step right up step right up step right up Everyone's a winner, bargains galore That's right, you too can be the proud owner Of the quality goes in before the name goes on One-tenth of a dollar one-tenth of a dollar we got service after sales You need perfume? we got perfume how 'bout an engagement ring? Something for the little lady something for the little lady Something for the little lady, hmm Three for a dollar We got a year-end clearance, we got a white sale And a smoke-damaged furniture you can drive it away today Act now, act now and receive as our gift, our gift to you They come in all colors, one size fits all No muss, no fuss, no spills you're tired of kitchen drudgery Everything must go going out of business going out of business Going out of business sale Fifty percent off original retail price skip the middle man Don't settle for less How do we do it? how do we do it? volume, volume, turn up the volume Now you've heard it advertised, don't hesitate Don't be caught with your drawers down Don't be caught with your drawers down You can step right up, step right up That's right, it filets, it chops It dices, slices, never stops lasts a lifetime, mows your lawn And it mows your lawn and it picks up the kids from school It gets rid of unwanted facial hair it gets rid of embarrassing age spots It delivers a pizza and it lengthens, and it strengthens And it finds that slipper that's been at large under the chaise longe for several weeks And it plays a mean Rhythm Master It makes excuses for unwanted lipstick on your collar And it's only a dollar, step right up it's only a dollar, step right up 'Cause it forges your signature. If not completely satisfied mail back unused portion of product For complete refund of price of purchase Step right up Please allow thirty days for delivery don't be fooled by cheap imitations You can live in it, live in it laugh in it, love in it Swim in it, sleep in it Live in it, swim in it laugh in it, love in it Removes embarrassing stains from contour sheets that's right And it entertains visiting relatives it turns a sandwich into a banquet Tired of being the life of the party? Change your shorts change your life change your life Change into a nine-year-old Hindu boy get rid of your wife And it walks your dog, and it doubles on sax Doubles on sax, you can jump back Jack see you later alligator See you later alligator And it steals your car It gets rid of your gambling debts, it quits smoking It's a friend, and it's a companion And it's the only product you will ever need Follow these easy assembly instructions it never needs ironing Well it takes weights off hips, bust thighs, chin, midriff Gives you dandruff, and it finds you a job it is a job And it strips the phone company free take ten for five exchange And it gives you denture breath And you know it's a friend, and it's a companion And it gets rid of your traveler's checks It's new, it's improved, it's old-fashioned Well it takes care of business never needs winding Never needs winding never needs winding Gets rid of blackheads, the heartbreak of psoriasis Christ, you don't know the meaning of heartbreak, buddy C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon 'Cause it's effective, it's defective it creates household odors It disinfects, it sanitizes for your protection It gives you an erection it wins the election Why put up with painful corns any longer? It's a redeemable coupon, no obligation no salesman will visit your home We got a jackpot, jackpot, jackpot prizes, prizes, prizes, all work guaranteed How do we do it how do we do it how do we do it how do we do it We need your business we're going out of business We'll give you the business Get on the business end of our going-out-of-business sale Receive our free brochure, free brochure Read the easy-to-follow assembly instructions batteries not included Send before midnight tomorrow, terms available Step right up step right up step right up You got it buddy: the large print giveth and the small print taketh away Step right up you can step right up you can step right up C'mon step right up (Get away from me kid, you bother me...) Step right up, step right up, step right up c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon Step right up you can step right up c'mon and step right up C'mon and step right up